I had a bit of an epiphany yesterday as I was waiting for my two-and-a-half year-old daughter to finish "helping" me put away silverware from the dishwasher.  This activity generally includes her putting at least three different utensils in her smiling mouth throughout the course of the chore and reaching for other items in the drawer that are only fitting in there by the grace of God and my creative cramming skills (like the can opener, chip clips, measuring cups, chop sticks we still haven't learned to use, and a random antique silver spoon with a lobster on the handle).  With each item my daughter likes to ask, "What IS this, Mumma?" as she pulls it from its cozy spot.  The pre-motherhood me was prepared for this moment: the grabbing, the mouth-putting, the asking.  I imagined myself standing there with her, answering her questions, gently guiding her to replace each item ("Now YOU see if you can get it to fit!") and eventually feeling satisfied that the silverware was all in the drawer.  Yesterday, I instead found myself hurrying her along, reminding her a little too quickly and repeatedly to "get the next spoon, put those chopsticks back" in my rush to check off another thing from my to-do list. So, my epiphany was this: I only get a few years of this. These few short preschool years are all I get to spend this much unstructured time with my little girl, to let her linger in play when I'd rather move along, to help her learn about the world around her when it would be easier to do it myself, and to take her on mini-adventures when I otherwise have things on my mind.  Oh my goodness it's not easy, but soon enough life will become increasingly busy and complicated.  I will only have less time with my daughter as she gets older.  I fear I will blink one day and she will be off to college. So I really want to be the mom I imagined myself to be. I want to use these few short years to be fully present with my girl when we're doing something together: reading a book or potty training or putting the silverware away... because these moments and days and years only happen once.